• Teacher: Schools almost over
• Teacher: and this is crazy
• Teacher: but here's three projects
• Teacher: due friday

• bladder: i'm so fat right now can you please just go to the bathroom so that i can lose all this weight please i'm so bloated
• me: shuttup and suffer i'm too lazy to get up

flawlessfucker:

thefingerfucker:

avatarstateyipyip:

pizzaforpresident:

So in one week we’ve got three cannibal cases in Florida, a man spitting blood all over a highway patrol officer, another man disemboweling himself and then throwing his intestines at two police officers, and a woman beheading her infant and eating it’s brain…….

people are finally seeing why I hate it here 

heheh srry guys we suk : )

(via yeahyeahwizard)

• News in Britain: stamps have gone up 14 pence
• News in America: cannibal eats man's face